Lisa Has Receipts

Season 9 Episode 5 Recap: The Proof Hurts

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This week’s episode was a bit dry to be honest with the exception of 3 key scenes; Teddi’s confession, John Blizzard’s confession and Lisa Vanderpump’s (LVP) receipts. The women have been saying for months that we, the audience, don’t know the full story and with each passing week, more will be revealed. They’ve been saying this to prove they will be vindicated. So far, Teddi and Kyle seem more and more guilty.

Now, as a follower of the show and the cast, I don’t only keep up with them when the show is being aired but I also do that off season, as well as during real time filming. I’m not a stalker I promise. LOL. In episode 3, while talking to Teddi, LVP asked her about the timing of the text messages she received and she responded that it didn’t matter. While at lunch with Kyle in episode 4LVP again attempted to bring up the timeline as it is paramount to her innocence.

EXHIBIT A

The week of July 29th – August 4th was when this supposed set up by LVP was orchestrated. So let’s look at some of these dates more carefully.

Sunday July 29thJohn Sessa, LVP’s business partner visited her home while she was having Sunday dinner to talk about the alert they receivedWhat was this alert? They received an email, informing them that one of their dogs, Lucy, was at a kill shelter (in Orange County) and that a reality tv star dropped the dog off there. Dorit has got some explaining to do. This email was sent to the general email line so every employee would have received it. We already know, based on texts, that Blizzard and Teddi had been in communication prior to this whole mess. Teddi is still downplaying their relationship as she claims in her blog that they don’t hang out nor ever had dinner together. Whatever! 

By her own admission, Teddi told us she went to Vanderpump Dogs once a week with her daughter to see the pups. Whether she and Blizzard hung out outside of the centre is irrelevant. She would have seen him every week and so a relationship would have naturally developed. LVP mentioned she doesn’t have contact information for Blizzard nor does she communicate with him. Teddi seems to think this is LVP lying because how can she not have communication with the event coordinator for the centre? I swear she thinks we are a bunch of mindless followers. By saying she doesn’t communicate with Blizzard, it’s obvious LVP meant outside of what is related to the centre. Give it up Teddi. You’re just mad you’re being called out for gossiping with a 22 year old. It can be assumed then, that Blizzard told Teddi this information as soon as the email was received because Sessa informed LVP about this, at her home.

Still on SundayLVP, Ken and Sessa were now discussing how best to handle the situation. As we’ve seen, LVP had vociferously defended Dorit for the past two seasons since she’s been on the show because of her loyalty to her and PK. She and Ken wanted Sessa to handle it as discreetly as possible but Sessa was furious. Mind you, they weren’t scheduled to film at LVP’s house that day and at this point, no one knew anything. As a partner of the centre, Sessa wanted Dorit to be held accountable because had Lucy not been microchipped, she would have been killed. They were at a standstill.

Sometime after Sessa left LVP’s house. She called Dorit to let her know about the situation. Yes, Dorit REALLY didn’t have a clue where Lucy was. Don’t let Teddi or Kyle (who had no prior involvement in this whatsoever but inserted herself) try to turn LVP telling Dorit that Teddi knew into something it wasn’t. LVP had to let Dorit know. So not only did Dorit re-home Lucy and break her contract, she wasn’t fined the $5000 penalty.

Monday July 30th LVP and Sessa were still in talks about the situation because they couldn’t get a hold of Dorit, to give them information about who she gave the dog to. I’m sure they had a staff meeting about the situation which is probably when Teddi and Blizzard were having this conversation

.

                                    Taken from Teddi Mellencamp’s Twitter.

I’m assuming this to be the date because LVP and Ken headed for Las Vegas to meet with Nick Alain about Tom Tom. As we saw on Vanderpump Rules that process was hectic and they didn’t even get light until the day before the Daily Mail Party. LVP must have really had it out for Dorit to be running around trying to get the Daily Mail party to be a success and opening Tom Tom, while still grieving her brother’s death, that she found time to instruct Blizzard to tell Teddi and somehow, telepathically, tell Teddi how to respond. It’s like she would be communicating with herself, no? Teddi, who are you? Examining the conversation further, it would seem that Blizzard was sending mixed messages to Teddi and she played right along. I mean, Blizzard wanted camera time as he suggests he’s would be a friend of the show for season 9. Someone’s parched! I’m still waiting for any proof from Teddi where she spoke directly to LVP about it. I mean, she isn’t close with Blizzard so why take his word for it over someone who had never be unkind to her and someone who’s supposed to be her friend? In the meantime, Teddi and her not close friend, Blizzard seemed to still be texting about the situation before they filmed that Thursday.

From Teddi’s Twitter

Teddi asks if LVP told Blizzard to tell her. Who cares? What if she did? No one told Teddi to say what she did. He responds “YES” then “Idk” because like he stated in the earlier texts, he felt like he was getting mixed messages but he still admitted they were calling him to be sure he didn’t tell anyone else. Blizzard was really playing everybody.

Wednesday August 1st –  LVP still had not filmed anything for The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills yet. This was the day they finalised the location for shooting on Thursday. LVP wasn’t there. She was still in Las Vegas.

And so we are at Thursday August 2nd – In episode 1 we got our first look into this debacle. We saw and heard Teddi ask if that was the dog as soon as she walked into the centre. It didn’t make sense at the time as to why she would ask that and even prompt her daughter, to say she recognised the dog. However, we do now.

Teddi had already made plans with Blizzard for the dog to be brought out, so she could ask about it. I don’t think she intended to make it a storyline per se but she definitely wanted it to be talked about. If you recall, in episode 1, while they were filming at Vanderpump Dogs, Dorit was seen telling Erika about what happened with her robbery and briefly mentioned the situation re Lucy. What fans may or may not know is, the scene with Erika and Dorit was filmed a few days after LVP, Kyle, Teddi, Sessa and Blizzard all filmed at the centre. Had Teddi not plan to bring this up on camera, there wouldn’t have been a story to tell.

If we recall, LVP tried her hardest to shut down talks about Lucy at the centre but because Teddi had an agenda, and with Kyle finally finding something to use against LVP and Dorit’s friendship (I still think she was upset about last season) they kept prodding. According to LVP, while on her way to meet Kyle and Teddi at the centre, she had been messaging Sessa to not bring up the subject. This, Teddi claims shows LVP‘s complicity. She really is missing a few screws, isn’t she? LVP knew they would be filming. There had not been any mention of this topic prior and she wanted to keep it that way but she had no idea that Teddi and Blizzard had other plans as we saw with the texts. That’s what is meant by “I had no idea Teddi would be gossiping” in episode 3. Being objective here, I could see why Teddi thought that LVP was trying to keep her hands clean because she says LVP wanted her to know the information and for her to put it out there yet she was backing out of the plan. The fault in that reasoning is, Teddi hadn’t spoke to LVP to confirm this plan that she and Blizzard discussed. So her claiming she knew LVP wanted the information to be spoken about on camera is weak and wouldn’t hold up in court. Let’s say LVP did want her to know, aren’t they friends? Don’t friends share what’s going on in their lives? No one told Teddi to respond the way she did but she assumed LVP would be on board with this plan as she alluded to in her texts and when she realised what she’d done, she knew she had to something to turn the attention away from her.

While all this was happening, Dorit was living here best life in Arizona for her birthday which was July 15th. She returned just in time to film with Erika on August 4th.

Now we’re caught up. Almost. Remember the BBQ in episode 1? This was filmed around August 12th, after Teddi brought up Lucy as she had planned to at the centre. Kyle was now aware of this which I feel like she and Teddi devised a plan to get her out of the situation. The oddest thing is, at the BBQ, Kyle wanted the issue to be brought up but LVP had already spoken to Dorit and PK about it and it was over, or so they’d thought.

I CONFESS, I CONFESS NOT

Erika invites Teddi over to her house for the first time. Don’t you just love a friendship formed over the dislike of someone else? It’s clear that Teddi wanted this out there as she claims in Erika‘s chapel (production really loves a dramatic flair) that she had seen Dorit at events but was ignored. I guess someone does hold a grudge like they claim LVP does.

Parallel to this scene, we finally hear Blizzard’s side and he gets the moment he’s been thirsty for. Quite frankly, I don’t care much for what he had to say to LVP because he was still lying about the things he said to Teddi via text.

Blizzard appears to be contrite but I don’t buy what he sold LVP because he and Teddi shared the following text exchange which I believe was when the women were in The Bahamas. Blizzard is telling LVP one thing then but gossiping with Teddi about her and Sessa. LVP needs to let him go.

                                                   From Teddi’s Twitter

THE RECEIPT WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR

Kyle is back from dropping off another daughter to college and for the first time ever, I found myself completely uninterested in anything related to Kyle. Since she’d been so vocal about the issue, LVP invited her and Dorit to show them proof that Teddi was being untruthful and withholding information.

What we didn’t know was that Kyle actually saw the text messages and still thought LVP was behind this. Of course, she only confessed to this in her confessional, similar to season 6 when she pretended to not know anything about Munchausen and let LVP get blamed for it, while admitting in her blog that she knew way beforehand what Rinna was going to do. Kyle, knowing LVP the longest, allowed her to be attacked and lied on by Teddi who she just met 5 minutes ago. It’s even more telling, just like I theorised in my last blog that Kyle helped Teddi crop the text message to show as proof to the women in The Bahamas. So it begs one to believe that Kyle did know about Lucy before they filmed at Vanderpump Dogs and she helped Teddi to to plan this attack. What they didn’t bank on, was LVP getting a hold of the texts. Kyle really is no friend of LVP’s. I wonder if she will come forward to LVP during filming that she knew about the texts before The Bahamas?

Kyle’s tagline this season is that in “In Beverly Hills, the truth always rises to the top” and what is true is that she was sneaky and involved in covering Teddi’s rear while leaving her friend, who she claimed had been a wreck over the loss of her only sibling, like lamb to a slaughter. She defended Teddi with the utmost swiftness and suddenly wanted to move on which is what LVP has asked them to do one month before. Goodbye Kyle!

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Tuesdays at 9pm on Bravo.

CHATTERBOX KEIRN

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Author: Keirn

Realist. Gobby. Juror #8. Follow me on twitter @keirnthomas. I watch a lot of tv and have a lot to say.

22 thoughts

  1. I wish these mean girls would read your blog, that Andy would read your blog so they would see us fans are not stupid. We see them,we figured them out and you broke it down great

  2. LOVE. Yep. yep. yep. And Kyle and Teddi need to stop telling us more info (texts) will reveal that LVP really was behind this. We’re not stupid. We know the season will carry on, back & forth with very little new info and no ‘big reveal’ of evidence to prove LVP plotted this.
    Teddi and Blizzard put this together. Teddi is motivated by all the issues with Dorit.
    Dorit SHOULD’VE been held accountable. Since she was NOT for screwball reasons “PK/Dorit are our friends” yeah…no…
    So, Teddi wanted Dorit to get the backlash among the rest of the women (and fans)~ this is why she so easily went along with the misrepresentation of LVP (by Blizzard) and Just Like That, it grew into a plot to bring out Lucy, etc.
    KYLE likely didn’t know anything about it until Lucy was brought out at LVP Dogs. BUT because LVP was trying to squash it to ‘protect Dorit’, that riled Kyle up. That is THE recurring issue with Kyle and LVP: you defend everyone else but me! <–Kyle to LVP
    For this reason, Kyle WANTS LVP to be guilty of spinning all this. She WANTS her to be calculating and mean.
    And! I can't let this go: Dorit is a vile, vile, vile lying narcissist. We ALL know Lucy didn't bite any of them. PK is just as inhumane. They'd give up their kids to a traveling circus after the first inconvenience. Lucy ended up at that kill shelter because Dorit told someone to get rid of the dog.

    Rinna knows it. Erika knows it. Kyle is pretty stupid…but she might know it. Teddi knows it.
    LVP knows it, but 'because friends', 'because reasons', she's showing mercy & grace and letting Dorit & PK off the hook. Karma begged to doggy-differ.

  3. The scene between John Blizzard and Lisa seemed a bit scripted, to put it mildly. Neither one is a great actor. Not direct quotes, but: I don’t know you right? (Lisa); and (John): It was wrong of me to speak for you– or something like that. Lisa says that his actions got her in a mess. Well, yes. Blizzard outed Lisa via text. I’m not buying what these two are selling.

    I understand your points in Lisa’s defense (and you make a great case). Bottom line for me is that Vanderpump looks and acts guilty. So what if she wanted to expose Dorit for being awful and have Teddi do it. It’s not the “crime,” i’s the coverup that looks bad.

    1. Teddi never spoke to Lisa. She was never coerced into saying anything. She said what she did. How can she say she knows for a fact Lisa instructed Blizzard? Lisa has never done anything to her. She was getting such information from someone she claimed she isn’t close to and didn’t ask the person she was supposed to be friends with? Cmon! We aren’t that thick. LVP had no time to do all that mess when Tom Tom was the priority and the Daily Mail party. She had been breaking down all summer as we’ve seen about her brother and from the ladies own admission. Setting up someone wasn’t even a thought. Surely you can see that.

    2. You should never judge a person guilty because of their looks. I’ve seen serial killers who look like a normal person in a normal neighborhood and loved by many..

      1. It’s not about looks. The fact is, Teddi never spoke to LVP during all this. She made an assumption and believed the words of someone she said she wasn’t close to over someone she actually spent time with and had never treated her poorly. There’s no going around that.

  4. Amazing – as usual – I look forward to your blog every week. Someone suggested you go to the re-union – that would be brilliant.

  5. this should be brought to,SAC and the higher ups at Bravo. The reunion will be a hot one ! Especially with RINNAs big mouth leading the way.

  6. Please please please make sure this gets to Bravo, Andy, Evolution, and the whole cast. You nailed it and it needs to be known. Put it on every social media you can think of. Thanks.

  7. Keirn how do you know for sure that they know all this? Aren’t you giving them too much credit? lol If Teddi is persuing this all over social media, how can we forget it & move on.. Erika is telling her to keep telling the story, so thats what dumbshit Teddi is doing. What makes you believe that Evolution, Bravo & Andy know the truth? The fans aren’t going to forget it.. I’ve even stopped watching because its too painful to see LVP emotionally abused every week. Me and my friends hate gangups!!! Come on Keirn, keep trying to push the truth on them, help LVP’s case so they show won’t be completely ruined.

  8. Lisa Rinna is the one who started the whole Manipulation Theory concoction! Talk about high school mean girls syndrome. They all followed her lead at the worst possible time in LVP’s life! Who needs friends like that? NOBODY!

  9. They have cut LVP down for years for not showing her feelings or being vulnerable. She is broken and weak over her brother and they scheme to take her down! Horrible! There are no friendships left! All fake! Bye Kyle!!!!

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